Don’t go chasing waterfalls, because if you do, you’ll get cut by this asshole who is tired of TLC songs.  Just stick to the rivers and the… man, no one who reads this is probably old enough to remember TLC.  Just… just take the damn shirt.  

Behold, the Homeless Samurai Ichigo, poorly hiding his theft of a 5’ summer sausage from Hillshire Farms in the mall.  If he plays it cool, he and his banana scissors are going to make it out of this waterfall mall without getting caught by the rent-a-cops.  Also above, the sun exploded into a beautiful nova. 

This is a NASA artist’s rendering of the center of a black hole, if you could actually see it.   The center is anime.  See how the writing cannot escape the event horizon?  Neither can the ladies once you slap this on. 

The perfect shirt to wipe cheetoh dust on, because it was hand-dyed in cheetohs to start with.  Screened on is “Scor/Pio” which of course is the name of that big and ridiculous shoulderpad set that comes with one free mecha-viking. 

Okay this shirt is a moldy lasagna cheese layer, people. 

The only thing more worrisome than this blog not having dried up on source material is that I actually find that normal. 

This is what happens in my tummy when I eat a volcano burrito, only depicted on rayon or some kind of silk/poly blend.  Bonus points for not just being a straight pattern, someone TRIED with this construction. 

I’ve never seen an anime hawaiian shirt have a stack crash into a Windows Blue Shirt of Death before.  I guess this anime needs a REBOOT HUH HUH HUH yeah shut up

ERROR 2:  RURONI KENSHIN BOOTLEG ANIME SHIRT HAS CRASHED DUE TO WEIRD COLORING AS IF HE WERE A WASHINGTON MARCHING BAND MEMBER WITH A GILDED PICCOLO.

Gonna be honest, I THOUGHT this was a hawaiian or bowling shirt.  The button on her collar fooled me.  In fact, I didn’t even notice until I was starting to write this and I erased the first paragraph.   That means it gets to stay, in virtue of just how garish it is.

I think this is from that anime where a girl can shoot railguns out of her hands, and there’s like a girl who wears a salad on her head, and it’s generally that level of plausibility.  Like being able to pull this off.  Even that guy can’t do it.  

Yeah. 

Here he comes, here comes Speed Racer, he’s a demon on your shirt.  He’s sideways fixed now and he’s gonna be chasing after someone, the wrong reasonably right way. 

DRAGON DRAGON  ROCK THE XXL DRAGON 

It happened, we found a DBZ shirt we hadn’t showcased before.  True to style, I cannot tell which side is which and would just wear it all day backwards.  Not that I could see that when I’m drowning in all that swag I’m gonna be putting out.

“I’m telling you, kids love wings.  Wings are the new big thing!  We need to make the wings bigger.”
“But Kenji, the wings are already 90% of the shirt!”
“WE NEED TO MAKE THEM BIGGER”
“No Kenji put down the wing tool in Photoshop no nooooo you’ll kill us aaaaallll”
“[Winging Intensifies]”

And that is the story of this shirt.